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Home Healing & Recovery Addiction, Sexual

Addiction, Sexual

Sexual addiction, especially pornography addiction, is becoming more and more rampant.  Once seen only in mature or adolescent men, it is now becoming increasingly common among both genders and throughout the lifespan.

Sexual addiction is the most difficult of all addictions to overcome - though it is so very common.  For that reason, specialized resources are provided here.  Other relevant resources can be found in the "Addictions, General" section.



Defending Against Pornography Print E-mail
Written by Carrie Wrigley, LCSW   

FamilyComputerThe internet is a marvelous tool, allowing us within seconds to access information, contact people around the world, and share our ideas with others.   But the internet has also, within a few short years, become the primary avenue for distributing pornography and other sexualized media.  Our laptops, cell phones, and other internet-ready devices have become a 24-7 resource, delivering all kinds of material with just a few clicks and perhaps a search word or two.   How can we protect ourselves and our families against the infiltration of pornography, and the tremendously addictive potential of this increasingly prevalent problem?

Defending against pornography has two faces :  first, to help those already addicted to porn to escape its enslaving influence; and second, to fortify ourselves and our families against exposure to it. It can be useful to describe this process with an acronym:  DEFEND:

               D - Discriminate

               E - Educate

               F - Filter

               E - Exemplify

               N - Neutralize

               D - Delight

Over the next few days on this site, we will introduce a series of articles detailing each of these seven steps, and providing information and resources to help carry them out.  Once these are available, they can be accessed by clicking on links from the listing above. For now,  it can be helpful to simply define the terms:

D - Discriminate:  Discriminating pornography is a first step to defending against it.   We must recognize what pornography is, the forms in which it appears, and the destructive impact it has upon ourselves, our families, and our society.

E - Educate:  We must learn and then teach others why internet porn is so incredibly addictive;  who it affects; how it operates; and how we can avoid or neutralize its destructive influence.

F - Filter:  We must filter out destructive material from our internet systems and media collections.  Commercial products can be useful as a first step in providing filtering and monitoring services on our computers and cell phones.   Beyond that, we must learn to internally redirect focus away from pornographic material, and toward more positive, uplifting material.

E - Exemplify: We cannot expect our children or others to follow advice we are not ourselves willing to follow.   As we exemplify positive manhood, positive womanhood, joyous marriage, and appropriate intimacy, we provide a model for our children and others to follow, rather than the destructive and dehumanizing models presented through pornography. 

N - Neutralize:  We can learn ways to counteract the negative impact of pornography on those exposed to it.  This is especially important for those who have become addicted to porn.  Also, the wives or significant others of those so addicted often suffer a deep sense of betrayal and trauma.   Resources are becoming available to help heal these wounds, and restore a sense of safety, assurance, and hope.

D - Delight:  We can learn to delight in the positive qualities of other people, of the world around us, and of appropriate intimacy.   Despite the growing influence of pornography, the world remains a magnificent place of learning and positive possibilities; and the internet remains a powerful resource for learning, connection, and growth.  We can learn to effectively immerse ourselves in these positives, while avoiding the significant dangers and challenges presented by pornography.

Lots of new information on these topics will be coming to this site very soon!   Watch this page for daily updates and additions over these next few weeks!   In the meantime, here are links to some additional sites you may find useful as resources for defending against pornography:

Fight the New Drug: Educating On the Harmful Effects of Pornography -  A new media-rich, youth-oriented site dedicated to providing information about the impact of pornography and how to fight it.

Out in the Light: Women Uniting Against Pornography - Videos, articles, and other information to help women in the fight.

Enough Is Enough: Making the Internet Safer for Children and Families - Information and resources for parents.

Combating Pornography: Replacing Darkness With Light(LDS) - Loaded with articles and information to help individuals, parents, spouses, leaders, and youth in the fight about pornography.

For additional resources, you can also browse the Best Books page on this topic at this site; or in the "Healing Sexual Addiction" section of our Bookstore.   We hope you will benefit from these existing resources, as others become available very soon!

 

 

 

 

 
Best Books on Sexual Addiction Print E-mail

These are our favorite books on healing from sexual addiction:

1) Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction, by Patrick Carnes, PhD

2) The Drug of the New Millennium - The Brain Science Behind Internet Pornography Use, by Mark B. Kastleman 

3) Your Sexually Addicted Spouse: How Partners Can Cope and Heal, by Barbara Stephens, PhD, Marsha Means, MA (for spouses of addicts)

4) He Restoreth My Soul: Understanding and Breaking the Chemical and Spiritual Chains of Pornography Addiction Through the Atonement of Jesus Christ, by Donald L. Hilton, Jr., MD (LDS Book)

Read more...
 
LDS Articles on Sexual Addiction Print E-mail

lds logo

  For many years, LDS Church leaders have been prolific in warning against the ravages of pornography and sexual addiction.  For decades they have taught that besides the personal devastation - emotional and spiritual - that this behavior engenders, it also generates incalculable heartbreak in marriages and families, as well as in society at large. 

The list below is by no means comprehensive, but represents some of the more recent talks on this subject by LDS leaders.    If you would like to suggest an additional article for inclusion on this list, please contact us to send us your suggested reference, to benefit other visitors to this site.

Favorite Articles:

gordonbhinckley

Gordon B. Hinckley,A Tragic Evil Among Us,” Ensign, Nov 2004, 59–62.   "Pornography is like a raging storm, destroying individuals and families, utterly ruining what was once wholesome and beautiful."

dallinhoaks Dallin H. Oaks, “Pornography,” Ensign, May 2005, 87. "Let us all improve our personal behavior and redouble our efforts to protect our loved ones and our environment from the onslaught of pornography."
thomassmonson

Thomas S. Monson, “Pornography, the Deadly Carrier,” Ensign, Jul 2001, 2. "Pornography, the carrier, is big business. It is evil. It is contagious. It is addicting. It is estimated that in recent years Americans alone spent $8–10 billion per year on hard-core pornography—a fortune siphoned away from noble use and diverted to a devilish purpose!... May I suggest three specific steps in our battle plan..."